Val Buys Hastings

Wednesday 17th May 2017

The official car went down to Hastings with Val, imperial, in it. The idea was for Val to sell London, buy in Hastings for less and have capital in hand. In addition, the seaside will bring happiness, especially with capital in hand. So why were all the properties scheduled for viewing the same price more or less as the London residence is intended to fetch?  The first one we looked at was an old nunnery beside a busy road so much at the back of Hastings as to be effectively elsewhere. The drawing room had a dim religious air, the only light coming from a stained glass window of great inferiority high in the wall. Otherwise there were no rooms, only corridors half-heartedly partitioned. The second one was airy with a good entrance lobby – a terraced house in a dreary stringy road but all right inside. ‘Why are you moving?’ Val Lady Bracknell-ed at the owner. ‘You don’t have to answer,’ he added terrifyingly. In any case, Val wasn’t having her house. Too much uphill. Val only walks these days if attended. Finally we saw a dwelling in a twittern, very near Angus Willis’s sacred Tudor House. It’s jammed right up against all the other houses, with only a tiny walkway or twittern between. There’s not a square-inch of the place that doesn’t need renovation but Val’s hell-bent. He totally wouldn’t look at much cheaper houses of the same size in another part of the town. Val will be elevated to a twittern and that’s that.

We were lent Genevieve Suzy’s seaside mansion for the night. It was enchanting to be living someone else’s life. I wasn’t up to battling over to Angus and Fergus’s out of town cottage for a barbie (they retire there at night from the glare and publicity of Hastings)  and all the restaurants were booked. I had a brain-wave.  Hastings, being by the sea, is a fish town. There are fish and chip shops. One I had been to years ago with Angus and Fergus. It seemed to have an arrangement for ‘take-away’ from the back door. Would we? Could we? We did. It was so simple to manage. You carry your wrapped fish and chips home with you. In the mansion, we styled yours into plates and made a dinner in that way. Incredible fun. We felt so new and daring. Val also had his sandwich from Marks and Spencer to finish up. He’d particularly wanted the Copidex and celery. All over her house, Genevieve had stationed chocolate treats, Easter eggs and tins of luxury biscuits. There was no perspective that wasn’t thus adorned. Too late Val discovered that we could have had Sauce Tartare with the fish and chips: there was a jar of mayo, as well as jars of gherkins and capers.

The next day Hastings was threatening to have its May Day celebrations which are horrid. A lot of people cover themselves in green paint. It’s awful. They look so awful. Their skin turns grey. The leaves cut and strewn everywhere wilt.  It’s squalor and decay rather than lovely green Spring as intended. There’s a really creepy giant doll paraded about. Can’t bear it. Once I thought differently but I’ve badly turned against Hastings May Day celebrations.

On the way back we stopped off at Great Dixter and Val bucked up. The joy and energy of that place never fails. A lot out but the main impression was of the ground thickly covered with plants about to burst forth. The real thing, unlike the dreadful throttled greenery dying all over Hastings town for the May Day celebrations.

 

We Took Fish and Chips back to Genevieve Suzy's Mansion

We Took Fish and Chips back to Genevieve Suzy’s Mansion:Have you Ever had Fish and Chips?

Fish and Chips is Wrapped for Transport: Val had His Carried by Me

Fish and Chips is Wrapped for Transport: Val had His Carried by Me

Genevieve's Biscuit Corner

Genevieve’s Biscuit Corner

Genevieve's Hall Easter Egg

Genevieve’s Hall Easter Egg

Genevieve's Choc Bunnies

Genevieve’s Choc Bunnies

Genevieve's

Genevieve’s Cake Corner

Horrid Creepy Hastings May Day Celebrations

Horrid Creepy Hastings May Day Celebrations

Frightful Rubbish: Hastings May Day Carry-On

Frightful Rubbish: Hastings May Day Carry-On: Look at Those Trainers. Very Traditional, to be Sure

 

 

Posted Friday, May 19, 2017 under Adrian Edge day by day.

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