I Emailed the Prime Minister

Sunday 21st March 2021

Harry Rollo said, ‘It’s had this effect on me.’ A manager asked him if he’d like to preview the layout for a performance. There is to be a performance, apparently, but with nobody there, of course, not even any performers quite possibly. Harry said, ‘But what’s the point? The Government have decreed the layout. What can I do about it?’

Where is the Government? All my feeds, including my lovely alternatives, have been switched off since Christmas. I look at Facebook and Instagram, and the Stock Prices, of course. You’d have thought if there were a Government and a Prime Minister it would be apparent. All the important developments have got through, such as the Duke of Edinburgh leaving hospital, Harry and Meghan (ugh!) and the events on Clapham Common. But of the Government and the Prime Minister, not a word. The Gay Mother says the Government is trying to ban demonstrations but how could this be true? When I question her she says, ‘You’ll have to find out for yourself.’ Well, that would mean switching on the Thought Machine and someone would be bound to say, ‘Lockd…n’ and I’d have to switch off again.

If you go out and about, you’ll see signs everywhere saying you should be at home. ‘Stay home. Save lives’ – they even have it in orange lights on motorways where normally it says, ‘Debris in the road’ or ‘Accident.’ It’s a little confusing because obviously if you’re reading these signs you’re not at home. But we get the main idea, which seems to be that we are to be kept alive. The Government policy is that the entire population is to be kept alive. You might wonder whether it is intended that this is achieved by a person remaining at home but there’s a certain disturbing undertow to the slogan which threatens that if you leave your home you’ll kill people. Possibly it matters less that you might stay at home and die there as well as killing everybody else in your home including staff.

But let’s not quibble. I don’t think there’s any reasonable doubt that the Government policy is to keep us alive. The thing is it’s usual for Government policies to be questioned, even criticised or denounced. So why not this one? It’s very ambitious for a start and also somewhat vague. How long must we stay alive for, for instance? Indefinitely? Or only for as long as restrictions remain in place, after which we’ll be free to die whenever we feel like it? It would be nice to know. A more fruitful line of attack, though, is What for? What are we being kept alive for? You may think this is a silly question. Debo began her article for the Graph on tiaras, ‘What are tiaras for?’ But at least the Government has never legislated that everybody must wear a tiara. But now everybody must remain alive so it’s only fair to ask, ‘What for?’ Is it so that we can mill about in the park in the afternoons in a rather desperate way along with everybody else because this is the only place we’re allowed to go apart from our own homes? But even that is something of a concession. Really the idea seems to be that staying at home is not simply the means by which we stay alive but the main purpose. We’re being kept alive so that we can stay at home. It’s all a bit circular and seems unlikely to be productive in the long term. Surely, eventually the population will turn to mush?

So I emailed the Prime Minister to ask. Royston said it’s a waste of time. His sister, of course, we know, but will that make any difference?

Posted Sunday, March 21, 2021 under Adrian Edge day by day.

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